I’m not sure how I feel about this, being that girl. It upset me at first. This is a primal expression of rage from today’s average male at something I do regularly. I guess I’m scumbag Stacy, hypocritical and slutty, dumb as a rock but thoroughly convinced she’s highly intelligent. That hurts. That makes me go back and sift through all the times I’ve done this and hate myself a little more.
Within moments the upset turned outwards though. Its like those guys in the friend zone who I just want to shake and kick in the balls: what right do you think being nice gives you the right to a date? Yes, yes, that’s all we’ve ever been taught, the whole lot of us media-saturated, post-idealistic, self-centered and entitled generation X kids. We believe that everyone is a sleeping beauty, a tortured soul with low self confidence because that’s the color of our generation. And somehow, we’re convinced that our bare-minimum kindness will be the best, only kindness that this person has ever seen and their panties will melt off and yeah.
Since when does texting imply a relationship? Isn’t it just small talk transplanted into the virtual world just like me blogging is just journaling with my thumbs? This brings up so many issues I have with the digital realm despite loving it and being a child of the interblag, and probably stuff I’m going to rant about in another post.
And so many problems with men’s sense of entitlement to our personal space. Our bubbles are very small, nearly skin-tight. Barely enough oxygen to breathe. Women are on display all the time in society, so even when we’re not displaying ourselves, it’s apparently ok to call out and ask questions and worst of all, expect and demand answers.
Some scumbag sitting on the steps of the place I work called out to say I had nice eyes. I get this a lot. I ignore it a lot. And that’s how things work, and the men just go off, especially in the city. But this schmuck has the gall to raise his voice and sassily snap at me in this threatening, 16 year old voice: “HEY. I SAID YOU HAVE NICE EYES.”
And I say thank you. Small and timid. Because I am a woman, and there is nothing else I can do and still survive in a dog-eat-dog world, much as I’d like to.
This goddamn sense of entitlement drives me insane not only because it’s false but because I start to feel bad about not fulfilling that entitlement.